Grab your spear guns, kids. It's time for a swim in the Snark Tank.
We start with one of the great debates of our time. Not paper or plastic, boxers or briefs, but public or private?
That's right, with the boys' state basketball tournament this weekend at Value City Arena, expect a rekindling of the increasingly-contentious debate over how schools should be classified when it comes to winning state championship trophies.
Public schools used to dominate, back when inner-city schools were flourishing in Ohio's larger cities.
But more and more, selected private schools, most of them, parochial schools, began to grab a bigger and bigger share of those championships.
Public schools complained, and eventually proposals occasionally arose to separate public and private schools in some way.
Such measures were narrowly voted down by member schools in the Ohio High School Athletic Association in both 1978 and 1993.
But next year, a Competitive Balance Formula will go into effect aimed at leveling the playing field.
It’s not even close now.
In the girls state tournaments last weekend, three of the four champions came from private schools. In soccer, all three boys and all three girls champions came from private schools. And in the seven divisions of football, all but one state champion last fall was a private school.
If I were king of the OHSAA, I’d split public and private schools into separate championship divisions. I’d break the privates into two classes and the publics into three. It might not be ideal, but it’s better than what we have now.
Spoken by a public school kid who ran on two state championship cross country teams in high school.
This is Sindarius Thornwell of South Carolina. You can watch him Friday night against Baylor in the NCAA Tournament.
He doesn’t have the greatest name in NCAA history, but he’s in the conversation with Fennis Dembo, U.S. Reed, Exree Hipp, Duany Duany and Majestic Mapp and Mister Jennings.
Things I like: Cuddling on the couch with my girls, watching the original Batman episides on DVD. "Atomic engines to power...turbines to speed"....Costco chili on a cold day...a good sweat on the elliptical...shopping at the perfect place for everything you never knew you always needed.
Things I loathe: People who pull out in front of me and immediately turn left...the screaming fools on First Take lecturing LaVar Ball on humility...the Cavaliers defense, or what masquerades as such...bellyaching about Colin Kaepernick not getting a job in the NFL because of his politics. Yeah, and? Free country, right? If you were in the entertainment business, would you hire a guy you know would offend at least half your paying customers.
Never let it be said I'm not doing everything I can to help Indiana end up with the best basketball coach it can. IU athletic director Fred Glass said he wants a guy with Indiana ties. I don't know about ties, but my man, Julian, has an Indiana sweatshirt and appears mentally cut out for Candy Pants Nation.